The Comedy of Steven Wright

I have been reminded several times this week of comedian Steven Wright. So, for this week’s Friday Funny I thought I would share a few of my favorite Steven Wright quotes. While searching for these I came across this video from Comic Relief featuring his comedy. You are guaranteed to laugh! Enjoy!

  • All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
  • I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone.
  • What’s another word for Thesaurus?
  • Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
  • I made a chocolate cake with white chocolate. Then I took it to a potluck. I stood in line for some cake. They said, “Do you want white cake or chocolate cake?” I said, “yes”.
  • I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
  • I installed a skylight in my apartment… the people who live above me are furious!
  • I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
  • I have an existential map. It has ‘You are here’ written all over it.

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